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aghaahmedullah

Black & White Pages

the stories that remain with you even after the last page is turned and forgotten about....

Jane Austen's recently found letter of apology to a lover.

Now this is something one rarely comes upon. Jane had written this letter to a separated lover. I am both moved and mesmerized by this insight into the author's life, her helplessly bad luck when it came to love and the kind of hopeless romantic that she was. Have a read:

 

 "I can listen no longer in silence. I must speak to you by such means as you are within my reach. You pierce my soul. I am half agony, half hope. Tell me not that I am too late, that such precious feelings are gone for ever. I offer myself to you again with a heart even more your own than when you almost broke it, eight years and a half ago. Dare not say that man forgets sooner than woman, that his love has an earlier death. I have loved none but you. Unjust I may have been, weak and resentful I have been, but never inconstant. You alone have brought me to this place. For you alone, I think and plan. Have you not seen this? Can you fail to have understood my wishes? I had not waited even these ten days, could I have read your feelings, as I think you must have penetrated mine. I can hardly write. I am every instant hearing something which overpowers me. You sink your voice, but I can distinguish the tones of that voice when they would be lost on others. Too good, too excellent creature! You do us justice, indeed. You do believe that there is true attachment and constancy among men. Believe it to be most fervent, most undeviating, in F. W. I must go, uncertain of my fate; but I shall return hither, or follow your party, as soon as possible. A word, a look, will be enough to decide whether I enter your father’s house this evening or never.”